Porn is everywhere – accessible, affordable, and anonymous. It’s what some call the triple A. But this convenience comes at a cost.
Because it’s so normalized, it’s easy to shrug it off: “Oh, it’s just porn. What’s so bad about that? Everyone watches it.” But just because something is common doesn’t mean it’s harmless.
In this article, we’ll explore some of the most common underlying causes that lead to porn addiction. But first, let’s take a look at the data.
What the Numbers Show Us About Pornography
As the internet has grown exponentially, it has allowed for the consumption of information and entertainment in a vast number of ways. From Netflix to adult videos, we’ve grown accustomed to immediately viewing what we want, when we want.
Fuelled by this relatively new type of immediate and private access, it has become increasingly easy for susceptible people to get addicted to adult movies and pornography. According to Pornhub, a major pornography website, their website had 120 billion visits over the course of 2024.
Pornography has come a long way since the days of poorly written narratives and VHS tapes. Over the years, it has become less taboo and more socially accepted. Still, data shows that the most popular time to watch porn is around 12 a.m., indicating that an element of secrecy remains in the repeated viewing of pornographic material. This secretive behavior often brings feelings of guilt, shame, and embarrassment.
According to research by Jeff Logue, Ph.D., it’s not just men who are using pornography at increasing rates. A growing number of women are engaging in the use of pornography, now making up one in three visitors to adult sites.
Porn Addiction: A Type of Process or Behavioral Addiction
In the field of behavioral health, defining what qualifies as an addiction isn’t always straightforward – especially when it involves behaviors like shopping, gaming, working, exercising, or even sex. These are often referred to as process or behavioral addictions. Unlike substance addictions, they don’t always come with obvious external signs. Porn addiction falls into this category.
People with process addictions feel compelled to repeatedly engage in a behavior to feel satisfied, regardless of the negative impact it may have on their lives. It’s important to consider not just what someone does, but how they relate to the behavior – the nature of their relationship with it.
Many people may not initially recognize that porn addiction use is problematic. They often dismiss it as harmless entertainment or a quick pick-me-up. However, the deeper issue lies in why someone is turning to it.
Are they using it occasionally for fun, or are they using it to avoid painful emotions like loneliness, rejection, or past trauma? It’s up to each person to decide whether any use, or how much, is okay. But when it comes to addiction, the key questions are: (1) Does this interfere with life? and (2) Is it being used as a way to escape difficult emotions – such as depression, loneliness, or boredom?
What’s Behind Porn Addiction
Traditional definitions of addiction often focus on compulsivity and continued use despite harmful consequences. While this is accurate, it can be too simplistic. It doesn’t account for the emotional and psychological roots driving the behavior.
For instance, a person may notice a desire to watch porn after feeling rejected – not necessarily in a sexual context, but perhaps after having an idea dismissed or being socially excluded. In that moment, porn offers a temporary illusion of feeling wanted. That’s one example of how it’s not necessarily compulsive – it’s a response to emotional pain.
There’s more to consider than personal impact. There’s an ethical side that often gets ignored. Many of the people involved in porn are trafficked, coerced, or abused. And even if you don’t want to, you may still be supporting people or industries that profit from exploitation.
So when I treat porn use, it’s not always just about addiction. Sometimes, it’s more of a wake-up call: “Look at the crime and abuse that seemingly harmless clicks can end up incentivizing.”
Causes of Pornography Addiction
There are many factors to consider when trying to understand the causes of behavioral addictions, especially porn addiction. That can range from a history of sexual abuse, to more straightforward enjoyment breaking up a boring day.
While I would recommend more individualized therapy to address someone’s particular struggle, here are some common underlying issues to consider:
Lack of sex
Let’s start with a common reason that is more situational than deeply psychological. We live in a hypersexualized world where it’s easy to feel like we should be having more sex. Feeling sexually deprived or frustrated about not getting the sexual stimulation that you need can make you turn to pornography when all it takes is the click of a button.
Past Sexual Abuse
It is extremely common to develop an unhealthy relationship with sex and sexual stimulation after a history of molestation or sexual abuse of any form. I see patients who feel immense shame around this since they feel as though they should have more respect for healthy sex since they know the dark side of it. But this discounts the amount of psychological damage even one episode can cause on how we attain sexual attention and what we find stimulating.
Stress and Frustration
When we feel overworked or overwhelmed, it’s natural to look for some form of escape from it. Pornography is convenient, and can be perceived as less destructive than many other addictions or choices to escape life temporarily.
Boredom
In a world of hyperstimulation and instant gratification, we need everything now. Whether from a lack of stimulation or a lack of purpose and fulfillment, we usually try to end boredom with the opposite: stimulation. While pornography can satisfy that drive, it can also leave the person feeling emptier than before.
Lack of Love
One of the most basic drives in life is to find security in relationships. That’s precisely why we’re so wired to seek out intimacy and close bonds. When we are deprived of loving companionship, it can be daunting to go through the effort involved in finding a special relationship. Pornography not only can make us feel wanted (even if virtually), but it triggers oxytocin, which induces a feeling of warmth and security.
Porn Addiction vs. Sexual Addiction: Understanding the Overlap and the Difference
Porn addiction and using sex as an emotional escape can look very similar from the outside. The key difference lies in intention and awareness. Instead of focusing on what separates them, it might be more helpful to explore their common ground:
If you’re frustrated with your day, feeling rejected by the world, carrying past abuse, seeking validation, or struggling with physical insecurity – these are all feelings that partners might share. Whether you use porn or your partner to escape unwanted feelings, it’s worth considering better ways to directly address life’s misery. Sex is in it’s healthiest form when it’s an expression of intimacy and love, not escape.
Sex with a loving, consistent partner has the power to address emotional wounds. Instead of escaping insecurity, having a partner who genuinely loves your body and appreciates your intimacy can heal the parts of you that feel unwanted or unattractive. But this requires conscious awareness of what’s happening and why.
When you truly follow what’s unfolding in those moments, you allow intimacy to build, connection to deepen, and healing to occur. Without that recognition, sex may continue to be just an escape rather than a path to recovery.
The same principle applies to porn addiction. The compulsive urge to use pornography often originates from deeper emotional patterns – patterns that need to be understood and healed rather than avoided.
How to Get Help for Porn Addiction
With Self Recovery, an online addiction recovery program I created, I designed it to approach all addictions as behaviors people use to regulate their emotional state. For that reason, it addresses both chemical and process addictions alike.
It’s not healthy to live under the premise of using a behavior compulsively to avoid the feelings triggered by a bad day, an argument with a spouse, financial worries, or even boredom. Suffering is an inevitability of life, and ultimately, we need to find ways to tolerate life’s difficulties while developing a more stable sense of purpose and satisfaction.
In Self Recovery, because we look at the underlying causes, we explore issues deeply enough for you to identify why porn feels compulsive – or why you turn to it in the first place. When you gain insight into your emotional triggers, the behavior may no longer feel compulsive – you begin to recognize the pattern as it unfolds. This allows you to actually gain control.
